Jim Frankenfield - Humor Pages

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Disclaimer - I did not write any of the humor in this archive, all of it came via email over the last 20+ years. I post it here for you amusement. Some may be political, some you may not find very funny. Don't blame me! And if it is political do not assume I agree or disagree with the viewpoint. I just thought it was amusing.



Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

Can't work in a pharmacy because the bottles won't fit into the typewriter.

Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in six months. The box had said "2 to 4 years."

Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.

When asked what the capital of California was, answered "C."

Can't make KoolAid because eight cups of water won't fit into one of those little packets.

Got hurt when she fell out of the tree while raking leaves.

Changes the baby's diaper only once a month because the label said, "Good up to 20 pounds."

After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.

What goes "vroomscreechvroomscreech"? A blonde at a flashing red light.

Two blondes are trying to get into their car using a coat hanger when one said, "Hurry, it's starting to rain... and the top is down!"

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